I dug up an old thumb drive and was going through some old files when I discovered a document called “YOLO Cruise”. It appears to consist of a series of “tweets” that I created, written by the world’s worst cruise line. Some of them were pretty funny, so I thought I’d share. I’ll also post them on my Twitter page (@michellishelli), because why the heck not?
Without further ado, I present to you: Tweets from the Worst Cruise Line Ever!
Captain completely plastered. If you can still walk in a straight line, report to command deck ASAP. #captainforaday #yolocruise
All lifeboats now replaced with bottles of rum. In case of ship evacuation, drink rum and use bottle as flotation device. #yohoho #yolocruise
Lost the first mate. Our stay in Barbados now extended until we find him, or until we run out of power, whichever comes first. #marcopolo #yolocruise
Random shore excursion day! Pick a bus and hope the fates are with you. #eeniemeenie #yolocruise
Our tech guys screwed up. From now on, there will be roving wireless hotspots. Grab your laptop and get moving, because the hotspots never stay in one place for long. #battleroyale #yolocruise
Chefs went on strike, so we tossed them overboard. Anyone with cooking experience (fast food counts), report to Deck 9. All volunteer cooks will get a chance to loot the chefs’ cabins. #omnomnom #yolocruise
Unrelated media of the day: