I love Settlers of Catan. It’s one of my favourite board games, I’ll play it anytime, and I actually win a fair amount, which is of course a plus. During some random Catan game a few years ago, I apparently penned a song about Catan, which I recently re-discovered in an old notebook. Thus I present it to you (in slightly re-touched glory) …
* * * * *
Rolling in the Sheep
(to the tune of Adele’s “Rolling in the Deep“)
* * * * *
(1st verse)
I just placed my second settlement on the board
I’m rolling wood, sheep, and brick, these resources I will hoard
You may ask me what I’m planning to do
Without no ore or wheat, you think I’m pretty much screwed
* * * * *
Furthermore, you say, why didn’t you build on eight?
If we only roll that number I won’t envy you your fate
But there’s a higher power in which I trust
Catan is mine to claim, and I’ll leave you in the dust
* * * * *
The dice are rolling, my hand is growing
I can’t help thinking that I’m gonna win this game
But a trend emerges, my horror surges,
I’ve got a bad feeling …
* * * * *
(Chorus)
Oh god it’s all my fault!
I’m rolling in the sheep!
And no one wants to trade, ’cause they’re worthless
Call me the Shepherd of Defeat
* * * * *
(2nd verse)
Why won’t you trade with me, can’t you hear me sigh?
I even gave my flock some names to entice you to buy
This one’s Fluffy, here’s Buffy and Puffy too
Look at how sad they are, they wanna go home with you
* * * * *
My sheep are crying, my hopes are dying
I try to stack them, but they all come tumbling down
They’re just too squishy to build a city
I’ve got a bad feeling …
* * * * *
(Chorus)
Oh god it’s all my fault!
I’m rolling in the sheep!
And no one wants to trade, ’cause they’re worthless
Call me the Shepherd of Defeat
* * * * *
Thank you kindly for your attention. Feel free to sing this at every opportunity, including on crowded trains and subways.
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Unrelated media of the day:
So this is apparently taken out of a psychology textbook …
Source: http://imgur.com/gallery/HfZ84Zs
Michelle Proulx - Author 
Bahaha. Dying over here.
Sent from my iPhone
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Woo! Success 😀
Brilliant song! I’ll be singing it for the rest of the weekend.
As for the unrelated media, I feel like some YA books sound like this. I could not get through The Maze Runner because the learning curve on the lingo was so high. There needs to be a balance in a story between immersive and comprehendible.
That was the problem I ran into with Neuromancer — it was a really fascinating cyberpunk world, except there were SO MANY slang words and references that I had a devil of a time keeping track of what was going on.
I also LOVE Catan. I agree: it’s awful when you’re rolling in the sheep and no one wants to trade. Unless you have a sheep harbour, that is. (The guy who first introduced me to the game threw actual temper tantrums if the dice wouldn’t roll his way. Naturally the rest of us responded by ganging up on him by both refusing to trade with him and by hedging him in so he couldn’t expand his settlements.)
Hahaha. Ganging up on people in Catan is so fun. And also an excellent way to make people storm off in a huff. I was thinking of including a line in the song about how the sheep harbor was already settled on, but it didn’t quite fit in with the flow.
When surrounded by strangers in elevators (lifts), I often giggle uncontrollably at the thought of turning to face everyone and announcing in my serious voice:
“You must be wondering why I asked all to join me here today.”
Now, I finally have something to follow up with. Thank you!
Haha my pleasure. Although if you’re going to burst into this type of song, I’d suggest recruiting a back-up singer to do the harmonies. If you’re going to traumatize people, might as well do it right.
Huh, what do you know. That’s my personal motto. :b