Two years ago, an anonymous individual wrote a hilarious fanfiction for Imminent Danger. Now, they have returned with the sequel: Chasing Nonconformity And How to Apply Social Media to It. The premise, of course, being that the story is retold via social media. It’s excellent. Read it!
Or, if you don’t have time, here are a few of my favorite gems: ((POSSIBLE SPOILERS))
Grashk has changed his name to Big Blue!
Big Blue: Help! I think someone hacked my account! I don’t know how to change my name back!
Varrin Gara’dar: I’m sorry stranger, I don’t know who you are.
Big Blue has changed his name to Grouchy Smurf!
Grouchy Smurf: Goddamnit!
Fino’jin has rated Sebara on Rate Your Rala’kamil! Fino’jin has given Sebara one star!
Sebara: Seriously!? What did I ever do to you?
Fino’jin: Nothing personal; you’re just different, so I hate you. I hate things that are different. That’s why I declared war on snowflakes that one time. Each one is unique, so they’re all godless abominations.
Varrin Gara’dar: Come on guys, we have to get the Nonconformity back!
Eris Miller: Why don’t you give your promise pendant to the damn Nonconformity!?
Varrin Gara’dar: I TRIED AND IT FELL OFF, OKAY!?
Vardriga the Fortune Teller: The destination lies within your journey! What you seek is where you left it! Don’t stop believing!
Sebara: What a bunch of garbage. That’s what I get for listening to a fortune teller.
Vardriga the Fortune Teller: Oh also, you should probably watch out for giant metal spiders.
Sebara: Complete waste of time…
Sebara: Wait Fino’jin, don’t you see? You’re a metaphor for the conflict that everybody’s faced in their personal journeys! We all hated our lives on our home planets, because we didn’t like the paths that society set out for us. We’ve been spending the novel chasing nonconformity… and you, Fino’jin, represent that conformity. And now that we’ve all embraced who we are, we can defeat you!
Fino’jin: OH MY GOD I’M A LITERARY METAPHOR!!!